Kevin and I have a little phrase that we use when one of us (usually me) starts despairing that we don't do something as well as someone else. The non-complainer (usually Kevin), says,
"It's a good thing we don't compare then, huh?"
Yes. It is a good thing we don't compare. I work really hard at not comparing myself to others. It's a hard thing to do isn't it?
My amazing husband is taking 16 credits of chemical engineering, he is in his hardest semester ever of school and he works 20 hours a week. He is doing incredibly well at school and is staying so motivated. And then, he takes an hour out of his night to do and fold the laundry because I'm freaking out so bad about the papers I have to grade for work. It's easy for me to think to myself "this is ridiculous! I am doing so much less than Kevin, I should be the one folding the laundry. Therefore, I am...
Lazy...
Pathetic...
The worse homemaker ever...
And Kevin is...
Amazing...
Long-suffering...
So much better than I deserve..."
BUT, it's a good thing we don't compare huh?
Our apartment is very rarely clean. There are almost always dishes in the sink and dishwasher always seems to be full. I can barely get myself to vacuum once a week. There are clothes and shoes all over the floor in our room, and our second bedroom always looks like a tornado went through it, even though we deep clean it ALL THE TIME.
I get discouraged about this sometimes when I go to neighbor's apartments and see how CLEAN they are, compared to mine.
But then I remember that we don't compare. And I also remember that my neighbors are not full-time students who are also working 15 hours a week and doing 10 hours a week of an internship. Their best is different than mine.
I am doing my best. That is what I have to keep telling myself. I am doing my best, and this is my best right now. My best will be different in a month and a half when I graduate (!!!). My best will be better, comparatively to what it is now. And I'm so excited for that day.
I have big plans to deep clean and reorganize our apartment after graduation. I have dreams about vacuuming every day, and scrubbing the toilet weekly. But for right now, I am doing my best, and I don't compare myself to others.
3 comments:
Thanks for this. It's a nice reminder that we really can only do our own best.
And you never know, sometimes your neighbor might be rushing and hiding the dishes in the dishwasher and the clothes in the bathtub when they hear someone at the door. :) You guys are awesome!
I can also tell you that the neighbor you were probably comparing yourself to (because I know who keeps a spotless house in that complex) is comparing things herself. PROMISE. You are fantastic, messy dishes and all :)
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